I'm listening to the music again.
In my pre-pandemic world, I listened to music CONSTANTLY. I always had a performance CD going in my car, or on my playlist or I was listening to new performances I could find on YouTube. Always. I loved the peace it brought to me and I loved the way it gave me creative inspiration.
During the pandemic, I stopped and I stopped completely. It was too painful. I had the constant thought in my mind that singing was pretty much over. Even going back to teaching and planning for various ensembles, I listened to music for the pure planning aspect of the exercise.
It wasn't until the last month or so that I realized I was actually listening to music again for enjoyment and with hope. I didn't realize exactly how much of a hole that great silence had cast over me. It's so nice to have that part of my life back. To some degree, the removal of music during those months was traumatic. It's so nice start relaxing the guardrails of my own mind that were preventing me from feeling and dreaming again.